Monday, January 19, 2009

Chuck

It could be her eyes or her smile. It could be the ridiculously long courtship and how he enjoyed every minute of it. It could even be simply the way she made him feel. Chuck could never pinpoint what. But he knew he did.

'There's something wrong,' Chuck thought. 'This is supposed to be hard.' Or at least for him. But Chuck was wrong. Falling in love is easy, falling out of love is the hard part.

And so it was. After exhausting the ears anyone he felt close enough to listen (you look like shite, a friend had kindly told him), Chuck turned to the bottle. And with the bottle went his senses. Chuck slept with more women in a couple of months than he did in the past couple of years. Yet something evaded him. A sense of loss, of emptiness. 'Something wrong?' A voice whose owner's name Chuck could not remember asked from beside. Chuck said nothing. He simply left.

So he sat in the local karaoke bar, listening to the horrible screeching (singing) of another Jay Chou wannabe.

最美的不是下雨天
是曾与你躲过雨的屋檐

Reminiscing, he thinks of the night they stood in the rain, holding on to each other as if they never wanted to let go. He thinks back upon every day of their short-lived relationship and the fights they had since. And he recalls his decision to stay away.

别想你忍不住我提醒自己
伤了心有些事也要过去
心很痛痛的不想再做我
自己别回头情已去缘已尽
很想你也不是因为失去你
爱了你用尽我全心全力

As another song by another horrible singer gets his thoughts going.

'I do miss you; when I lie on my bed, sleepless in the middle of the night feeling small; when the going-ons of everyday life makes me feel lousy; when I'm working in the small hours, looking for someone to talk to; when I'm happy, wishing you were there to share it with.'

'But most of all, I miss you when your around. When you're here. When you're not, I can think of what's happened as a memory from a distant past, a bad dream, or even a figment of my imagination. It's easier this way.'

And Chuck wonders if this is the right thing to do. But he does not care anymore. Not for now at least. As he gets up to leave, he at last hears a decent singer on a song with lyrics that happen to hit home.

在有生的瞬间能遇到你
竟花光所有运气
到这日才发现
曾呼吸过空气

Perhaps.

*****

Wow, if your here I guess you bothered to read this entry. I was listening to a regular on 'love' at work the other day and thought of writing something along those lines. That's what Neil Gaiman does for you.

Now tht I've finally gotten down to writing it, I'm not gonna insult your intelligence by claiming this story is purely fictional but well, at least most of it is. I hope you enjoyed it bitches. =)

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